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Personal is Political: Chicana Motherwork - The Feminist Wire

18.7.17

Personal is Political: Chicana Motherwork - The Feminist Wire: My form of survival over the next ten years was to travel and experience the world in a way that deviated from what I had always known. But in those years, every time I returned to the home in which my mother and sister shared, I often asked myself what it was that I was doing away from them. The feeling intensified when I would wake up to hear and see my sister feeding my infant niece in the middle of the night or when I would watch my mother rise early and cook for her granddaughters every morning. Years later, the feeling deepened when my mother became terminally ill, and I witnessed my sister take most of the responsibility for her everyday care. The contradictions of accountability, belonging, and family have followed me throughout my life.

Twelve years to the date after my father died, my daughter was born, a strange coincidence for some, but a reminder to me that my coming into motherhood was directly linked to his memory and his spirit. My daughter was 5 when she lost her bia, my mother. Although my mother had retreated to the echoes of her mind since I had announced my pregnancy, her physical departure left a gaping hole in the lives of our family. As an adult child with no living parent, I’ve had to think long and hard about carework and mothering, about what it means and what it can look like in the absence of those that cared for and parented me. These musings have taken me back on long journeys through my childhood as a way to imagine how these experiences have and will shape my own daughter’s life.


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